Mindfulness and Christmas: Ho! Ho! Whoa!
by Maya Frost
If there's one thing I've learned about Christmas over the years-- whether I've been in India, Thailand, Japan, Uruguay, China, Mexico or Argentina--it's that the most relaxing and memorable ones happen when I get to start from scratch.
I don't have to include all the traditional events and activities because it's simply not possible. I'm not compelled to come up with new and improved versions of the annual festivities because I'm given the gift of a brand-new, stripped-down format.
It's back to Christmas 1.0, and I'm free to create my own kind of celebration.
The blank-slate Christmas starts with being with others--those I've loved for years, or those I've just met--and from there, I can start doodling. Sure, I try to keep some common elements-- listening to Christmas music, watching Christmas movies, talking about Christmases past while drinking egg nog, and looking forward to stockings on Christmas morning. But beyond that, I can simply enjoy the opportunity to do it all differently.
Much of the stress of the holiday season comes from trying to do the same things every year. After all, what is Christmas without that caroling party, that concert, that gift swap at the office, that visit to Santa, that family trip to the mall? As the years go by, we end up with so many layers of traditions that the entire month of December is a non-stop frenzy of celebration.
We pack our schedules because we are afraid that if we miss something, we'll somehow ruin Christmas. We are so worried that our loved ones might have a lousy Christmas unless we do everything right that we go into overdrive to make it super special--even if that means we're completely exhausted and dreading the credit card bills in January.
But a funny thing happens when you have the same Christmas routine year after year: you can't distinguish one year from another. They all fade into one big Christmas blur. Having a different place or different way to celebrate can make this holiday the one that really stands out in your memory years from now.
Listen, even if you're likely to stay in your usual Christmas location and feel committed to your usual holiday traditions, remember that you always have the power to curate your Christmas. It can be as simple as saying, "I won't be able to make it" or "We've got other plans that day."
How does that feel?
Here's a simple mindfulness tip to help you step back from the hustle and bustle.
I call it Ho! Ho! Whoa!
Whenever you or your loved ones start feeling overwhelmed by a holiday activity, say, "Ho! Ho! Whoa!"
That's everyone's cue to pause and ask, "Does this feel like a joyful celebration? Will I/we feel more connected if we do this?"
Give yourself--and those you love--permission to have a different kind of holiday this year. That doesn't mean giving up everything. It simply means curating your Christmas so that there is plenty of room for newness and much less stress about hanging on to every single tradition that has been added over the years.
You can't mess up Christmas unless you stop paying attention to what matters most: celebrating with others, and having enough time to enjoy the gift of presence.
Make this the Christmas you did it differently, with greater attention and intention, and less knee-jerk mania. This can be the one about which you say, "Remember that one year when we did Y for Christmas instead of X?"
Last December, I was living in Mexico. We celebrated the holidays in a rented beach house in a very small town, and I had a serious kidney infection that required a trip to the emergency room. But you know what? That turned out to be a pretty memorable Christmas.
Not that I want to repeat it, of course, but even sitting in a blood-spattered emergency room getting an IV inserted was its own, um, gift. It made me feel enormously grateful that my husband and daughter were right there with me. Once I was feeling better, we laughed ourselves silly about the whole experience.
This year, I'll be celebrating Christmas with new family members and friends I barely know in a place I've never been. It's all going to be new, and we will make it up as we go along.
What a gift.
© 2006-2020 Maya Frost
Please include the following when sharing:
Maya Frost is an author, mindfulness trainer, and creative change strategist.
Learn more at MayaFrost.com
I don't have to include all the traditional events and activities because it's simply not possible. I'm not compelled to come up with new and improved versions of the annual festivities because I'm given the gift of a brand-new, stripped-down format.
It's back to Christmas 1.0, and I'm free to create my own kind of celebration.
The blank-slate Christmas starts with being with others--those I've loved for years, or those I've just met--and from there, I can start doodling. Sure, I try to keep some common elements-- listening to Christmas music, watching Christmas movies, talking about Christmases past while drinking egg nog, and looking forward to stockings on Christmas morning. But beyond that, I can simply enjoy the opportunity to do it all differently.
Much of the stress of the holiday season comes from trying to do the same things every year. After all, what is Christmas without that caroling party, that concert, that gift swap at the office, that visit to Santa, that family trip to the mall? As the years go by, we end up with so many layers of traditions that the entire month of December is a non-stop frenzy of celebration.
We pack our schedules because we are afraid that if we miss something, we'll somehow ruin Christmas. We are so worried that our loved ones might have a lousy Christmas unless we do everything right that we go into overdrive to make it super special--even if that means we're completely exhausted and dreading the credit card bills in January.
But a funny thing happens when you have the same Christmas routine year after year: you can't distinguish one year from another. They all fade into one big Christmas blur. Having a different place or different way to celebrate can make this holiday the one that really stands out in your memory years from now.
Listen, even if you're likely to stay in your usual Christmas location and feel committed to your usual holiday traditions, remember that you always have the power to curate your Christmas. It can be as simple as saying, "I won't be able to make it" or "We've got other plans that day."
How does that feel?
Here's a simple mindfulness tip to help you step back from the hustle and bustle.
I call it Ho! Ho! Whoa!
Whenever you or your loved ones start feeling overwhelmed by a holiday activity, say, "Ho! Ho! Whoa!"
That's everyone's cue to pause and ask, "Does this feel like a joyful celebration? Will I/we feel more connected if we do this?"
Give yourself--and those you love--permission to have a different kind of holiday this year. That doesn't mean giving up everything. It simply means curating your Christmas so that there is plenty of room for newness and much less stress about hanging on to every single tradition that has been added over the years.
You can't mess up Christmas unless you stop paying attention to what matters most: celebrating with others, and having enough time to enjoy the gift of presence.
Make this the Christmas you did it differently, with greater attention and intention, and less knee-jerk mania. This can be the one about which you say, "Remember that one year when we did Y for Christmas instead of X?"
Last December, I was living in Mexico. We celebrated the holidays in a rented beach house in a very small town, and I had a serious kidney infection that required a trip to the emergency room. But you know what? That turned out to be a pretty memorable Christmas.
Not that I want to repeat it, of course, but even sitting in a blood-spattered emergency room getting an IV inserted was its own, um, gift. It made me feel enormously grateful that my husband and daughter were right there with me. Once I was feeling better, we laughed ourselves silly about the whole experience.
This year, I'll be celebrating Christmas with new family members and friends I barely know in a place I've never been. It's all going to be new, and we will make it up as we go along.
What a gift.
© 2006-2020 Maya Frost
Please include the following when sharing:
Maya Frost is an author, mindfulness trainer, and creative change strategist.
Learn more at MayaFrost.com