I know you were not fishing for it, but I am putting YOU at the top of my gratitude list. I would never have made this move without your support, and I truly mean that.

Remember when I told you that Dad's last words to me before he died were, ´Son, you have got to slow down and start paying attention to what really matters.´? I think he would be proud of the changes I have made in my life.

The biggest thing for me: my relationship with J (who is 13 now). He came out to spend the month of July with me here. We were both nervous at first. I was excited to do projects with him, like my dad did with me. We built a screened-in porch on the cottage during that first week. It was so hot that we got hammocks to hang on that porch, side by side. We slept there at night, spent afternoons there, talking, reading, napping.

When his mom came out to pick him up, we all prepared a big lunch together. He was so proud of the pie he made! Picked the peaches, looked up a recipe online, everything. It was perfect. He showed his mom the greenhouse we built, the picnic table he did on his own. (And how amazing to be building these things with my son using Dad´s tools!)

As he got ready to leave, he gave me a big hug and said, ¨'Dad, I feel like we're best friends again, like when I was a little kid.' I could barely breathe. He turned to carry his stuff to the car, and his mom smiled and said, ´Mikey, I think you have become the man I always thought you could be.´

I will cherish that memory for the rest of my life.

Other things: I have a dog I call Arrow who showed up one day, bony and skittish, and never left. We go everywhere together.

I have a new best friend down the road named Martha who is 72 and funny as hell. She had a picnic at her place and introduced me to all the neighbors. The two of us go to the Farmer´s Market together. I did some repairs for her. She showed me and J how to make raspberry jam and pickles. We watch out for each other.

I used to spend my days obsessing about abstract things. Now, I breathe the fresh air, touch the trees, listen to the birds, watch the deer, build useful things with my hands. I have people I care about, and we do the simplest things together.

It is so much more than enough.¨

October 2025 UPDATE:

¨Hey, Maya. I appreciate your question about what helped me.

I think the conversation with you I value most was about building a local community.  And it stuns me to say that, as I grew up in a small town and loved the warmth and closeness of it. It´s shocking how far away I got from that early lesson in reciprocity and care. 

That discussion really moved me. Then, it was going through Dad´s tools in his workshop, remembering all the time we spent together using them, that reminded me of what was possible in a quieter life. 

I realized how lonely I was, how I had been isolating.

Now, I feel rooted. I have neighbors I have taken the time to get to know.  We´re a mixed bunch, to be sure, but we are friends who take care of each other. I am learning so much from them.

I feel blessed to have this community. Thank you for planting that seed of hope in me that I could experience this again in my life.¨