A Global Shift In Our Family

by Maya on September 1, 2010

globe tiltToday, our daughter, Tara (number two) is moving from Buenos Aires, Argentina to Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates.  She’s been teaching English to a range of students in Buenos Aires.  She absolutely loves teaching, but costs are rising and she is ready for a new adventure and better prospects for a good salary.

In her new job, Tara will be teaching kindergarten at a girls’ school.  Her apartment (provided for her by the school) is actually in the same building, so her cross-city commutes will disappear completely.  Her working hours will be 7:30 to 12:30, meaning no more late night classes to fit in private students who work long hours.   Her pay will be about five times as much as she was making in BA (which was considered good for a teacher), she gets extensive paid vacation and a ticket “home” once a year.  Needless to say, she’s pretty thrilled.

And we’re super excited for her as well.  She deserves this.  She’s a hard worker and she’s great at diving into new places.  I’m sure she’ll thrive.

But the interesting thing for Tom and me is that it feels as though something has shifted for our family. Until today, we had four of the six of us in South America, with Talya and Tara living across the street from each other in Buenos Aires and Tom and I living in the farmhouse in Uruguay.  We’re only about three hours away by bus/ferry, meaning we could see each other every month or two.  Taeko is in New York City and Teal is working the northern Mediterranean route for Norwegian Cruise Lines through January, so it felt as though the BA/Uruguay segment of the family was the anchor.

Now, our little clan’s domain has shifted eastward in a big way.  Taeko will be visiting us in late September, and she has a great invitation to spend Christmas with a good friend in Ireland.  She is hoping to join Tara in Abu Dhabi for New Year’s. Teal will be on the ship through the holidays, and though we hope she’ll make the trip down to BA/Uruguay to see Talya and Tom and me during her six weeks off, she might be tempted to head to Abu Dhabi or meet Tara somewhere for a visit.  We’re happy whenever our kids get together–we truly feel that the time they spend with each other is an investment in their future, so we always encourage their visits with each other rather than trips “home” to visit their parents.

It’s clear that our gatherings will become even more challenging over the next couple of years, but that’s perfectly fine with Tom and me.   Do I think we’ll always be so scattered?  Nope.  As Tara told me during our online chat this morning, “I think that when one of us has a kid, that’s when we’ll all look at ways to live close to each other.”  I think that’s true, and I look forward to it.

Until then, I’ll say yet another farewell with nothing but joy and enthusiasm.  These are their prime see-the-world years, and I couldn’t be happier that the girls are doing just that.

{ 4 comments }

Uruguay back porch roofThis is a post about transparency.  As a helpful visual aid, I offer this photo of the roof of our new back porch.  The old one was black, making the porch really dark.  I wanted the light, especially since the porch runs along the kitchen wall and having it clear means much more sun in the kitchen.  (Feel free to remind me of this folly during the summer months, but for now, it’s fabulous.)

I’ve been thinking a lot about transparency in all its forms for a number of reasons.  One, the remodel is ALMOST done (no, really) and we’re shifting our focus to the garden and ways to use our old windows for a series of cold frames or perhaps a greenhouse.

But that’s not really what I’ve been thinking about.

See, actually, I’m in the middle of a long agent-shopping process.  Those who have been following me for some time know that I decided to end my contract with my previous literary agent at the end of December.  It was an amicable split, but I have to point out that most writers I know think I was insane to give up a perfectly good agent.  The thing is, if your agent isn’t into what you want to write, there’s really no point in trying to force a partnership.  I think it’s essential for both author and agent to have flaming enthusiasm.  If it’s not there for one of them, it’s time to move on.

Anyway, in January, I pitched a memoir to several agents, got a ton of interest, several agents offering to represent me.  I picked one.  We worked together on the proposal, which changed in very big ways, and she pitched it to three publishers, all of whom rejected it.  (One said it lacked energy/drama, two said it was too speculative–they wanted more of it done before they would commit to it.  Fair enough.)  My agent was on the fence, not especially confident about selling it in a crowded travel/memoir market, so I decided to put it on the back burner.

Something interesting happened during that process.  I decided I didn’t want to write a memoir–at least, not the version most likely to sell.  More importantly, I decided that I didn’t even really want to write nonfiction.  (Keep in mind that everything I say is with regard to the present moment–I am not saying I NEVER want to write nonfiction.)  So, if I didn’t want to write nonfiction, but I wanted to write, that meant I had to write fiction.

Hmm.  I had never written fiction.

But I gave it a shot.  Why not?   And I had fun.  I wrote a contemporary women’s novel in about two months.  My new agent did not represent fiction, so I had to once again go on the hunt for a new agent, sending out queries.  I did that in May.  Three wanted to read the entire manuscript and did so–one hated it but was actually quite nice about my writing, two liked it but were not confident they could sell it in this crowded women’s fiction market.

Not one to rest on my laurels, I had already started another novel.  This time, I thought I’d play around with YA (Young Adult).  It happens to be the fastest-growing area of publishing.  I didn’t know anything about it, really, but I had an idea for a story, so I just started in.

I should mention that while I wrote the YA novel, I was a) staying in six different places during six weeks because b) our house was being remodeled and was impossible to live in and then c) okay to live in but still very noisy/dusty/disruptive with workers pounding or drilling or sawing all the live long day.  These are not ideal conditions for writing a book of any kind.

The funny thing is that I DID write it, and I loved every single minute of it.  It was the most fun I’ve had in a long time, and that is saying something, since pretty much all I do is have fun.

In August, I ONCE AGAIN did the email pitches to agents, some of which dealt with YA only, and on Friday, I sent the full manuscript (87,000 words) to three agents who requested it.  Today, (Sunday) I sent it to another who did so.

Now, I wait.

I have no idea what will happen this time around.  I hope I get an agent.  I hope I get a book deal.  I really, really want to write a series of these YA novels.  But I get that the publishing market is shifting by the minute, that things are unpredictable, and that there’s no counting on anything.

I also realize that it takes a jaw-dropping amount of chutzpah to write a novel in ten weeks and expect ANYONE to even CONSIDER it.  It’s cocky as hell, really. But honestly, I think this one is pretty good.  I am not the judge of that, ultimately, but we’ll see what others say.  One thing I’ve learned is that if you want to get published, you must 1) write 2) pitch and 3) repeat.  You cannot be shy.  You cannot be reluctant.  You absolutely cannot give up when you get rejected fifty or seventy times.  You have to write and get better at it, and it sure helps if you happen to do it with a big grin on your face.

Another thing I’ve learned:  agents tend to be really nice people.  They love books, they love authors, and they really do care about the writing and their clients.  Still, it’s all about fit.  I’ve been very impressed by the kindness shown to me by agents, and truly appreciate the time they have taken to respond, to read my work, and to give me their honest opinion.  I feel confident that I will find the right agent for me eventually, and to be honest, I have really enjoyed this whole process.  I don’t even mind getting rejections–but I do prefer the personal ones (even when someone hates what I have written).

I’ll be spending the next days/weeks waiting to hear the verdict.  I also have a nonfiction proposal in the wings that I will pitch if the YA thing doesn’t really come together.  In the meantime, I’m going to go outside (spring is coming!) and play in the soon-to-be garden.

No matter what happens, I’m thrilled that I have had the chance to write so much in the last eight months.  For any aspiring writers out there who wonder how someone can crank out two novels and a third of a memoir in that time (admittedly not the highest quality, but a good 2o0,000 words nonetheless), I hereby reveal my personal secret to productivity:

A crappy internet connection.  No phone.  No television.   That’s my recipe for writing.

Wish me luck.

{ 6 comments }

Found-Object Decor, Continued: Fence-Post Light Fixture

August 12, 2010

When we moved into this house in January, each room had a bare light bulb and no electrical outlets other than one in the kitchen for the refrigerator and one in the far corner of the living room.  We’ve had to do a little updating.
But we kept this.  It’s the dining room light fixture made [...]

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Simple Living: The Pared-Down Beauty Regimen

August 9, 2010

I’ve never been a very high-maintenance woman in terms of personal care items or clothing.  But at 50, I do hear the siren song of those magic anti-aging potions, and I pause to check out Jane Fonda’s or Sharon Stone’s wrinkles (or lack thereof) and consider how the product they’re pushing might take ten years [...]

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Uruguay Farmhouse Decor: Found Objects, Rusty Implements

August 8, 2010

So far, we don’t have anything on our walls in our farmhouse except this:  a metal cow that was nailed to a tree outside.  The previous owners must have left it–I loved it immediately.  It’s on our kitchen wall.
There are all kinds of cool things to play with to decorate the yard, and they’re all [...]

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Our Monthly Living Expenses in Uruguay

August 6, 2010

I get a lot of email from people all over the world who are curious about how much it costs to live in Uruguay.  Well, I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m happy to share our monthly living costs, just to give you an idea of what’s possible.
Please note that we have no mortgage or [...]

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Uruguay Photos: Campo Footwear

August 4, 2010

Remember the white boots I bought last summer after the fire ant incident?  They are my go-to footwear whenever I step outside to dump compost, hang laundry, visit the cows, or wander through the meadow.
Depending on his mood, Tom opts for his fake Crocs, his knee-high rubber boots, or his leather campo boots (in the [...]

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Uruguay Kitchen: Simple Supplies, Glass Containers

August 3, 2010

The kitchen is Tom’s domain, and he fills all kinds of glass containers with the food we buy in bulk at our local store.  Beautiful, no?

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Uruguay Country Kitchen Photos

August 3, 2010

A lot of people have been asking to see photos of our remodeled farmhouse.  I guess I’ve been reluctant to post them because it’s just not a very wow house, you know?  And I mean that in the best way possible.  We specifically did NOT WANT it to look even remotely upscale, so we kept [...]

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Uruguay Update: Stray Dog, Stray Pig, Flat Tire, and the Carpenters

July 18, 2010

It’s been an eventful week.
Over a week ago now, the stray dog that had adopted us was killed instantly by a car on our road.  She was not very smart about cars or about other dogs, and was constantly running across the way to pick a fight with the neighbors’ dogs and then dash back [...]

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