Maya Frost with one of her favorite Lucky Baby students.

Now that I’ve had a couple of what I affectionately refer to as “batches” of babies completing my Lucky Baby series, I’m learning a ton about babies, learning and people in general.  As I mentioned in a previous post, I already recognized the “sweet spot” between six and nine months of age.  Here are seven realizations from the past month:

1)     Most people are terrified of groups of babies. Oh, sure, plenty of adults are more than happy to be handed a single baby for a few minutes, hoping the baby won’t cry during the gootchy gootchy goos.  But take even an experienced parent or caregiver and offer them a chance to sit in a room full of a half dozen infants, and most will quickly come up with an urgent reason to get the heck out of there.  Most are happy to hover by the doorway and admire the cuteness, but suddenly remember a pressing engagement once invited inside.  Time after time, I’ve seen relatively baby-seasoned people blanch at the very notion of being surrounded by babies and few would take my place willingly, even for a moment.  This bodes well for me in terms of job security.

2)     The infants cry far less in my classes than the one-year-olds do. Both have their mothers present, so that isn’t the issue.  It’s more the fact that babies simply sit and listen (intently) while the ones tend to be climbing around and/or getting frustrated about something they want to do but can’t.  Most mothers are convinced that a Lucky Baby class will be full of screaming babies—theirs among them—and are very surprised at how calm everyone is.  Other than the first class of each session in which there is usually one very freaked-out baby who has never encountered a foreigner and/or a group of other babies, I have never had any babies cry during class.

3)     There appears to be a significant difference between the babies that have been through the series and those that haven’t. This has come as a big surprise to my staff and me.   We expected the infants to be more familiar with me, more comfortable hearing only English, and used to sitting in a group with other babies, but compared to the babies and toddlers I teach who have not been through the series, the Lucky Baby crowd has a markedly increased attention span, better eye contact, and an overall level of contentedness that far exceeds the others.  Now, I don’t have a way to measure this—it’s anecdotal at this point and an admittedly small sample size (20 or so)—but even adults who have never met any of the babies before would be able to pick the Lucky Little Ones who have been through the series and those who haven’t.  Since they’re not talking yet, there is no tangible language difference, but the difference in attention is dramatic.  Since several studies confirm that bilingual children have a greater ability to pay attention despite distractions than their monolingual peers, I wonder if it’s possible that this difference can show up even at this very early age among children exposed to a second language.

4)      Parents can mess up even one year olds. I feel like a bit of a baby snob for saying this, but it’s so much easier to work with the infants than the toddlers because many of those between one and two years of age have already developed bad habits, no thanks to their parents or caregivers.  I can’t tell you how many barely intelligible “thank yous” I get every day from toddlers whose well-meaning parents have taught them how to show their gratitude to me.  “San-koo-yoo” isn’t helping with the whole phoneme-learning thing, folks.  And that’s just the pronunciation issue—the real problem is the total dependence on the caregiver (often a nanny or grandmother) to the point that the child can’t pick up a toy or place a puzzle piece without being coached and guided.  Of course, they certainly have the ability to do that (and much more) on their own, but they’re never given a chance.  And don’t get me started on the one-child challenge.  A roomful of toddlers who have never even once shared space/toys/attention with another child is a sight to behold.

5)      The classes are eye-openers for parents. Since this is the first (and only) child for these parents, they’ve never had a chance to compare their baby with any other.  They are full of “Is this normal?” questions and get a tremendous amount of relief from the advice I offer and support from the conversation with other mothers.  They really enjoy getting together for the classes—as much for themselves as for their babies.

6)  The babies are very social. Having had several of my own preschoolers at once, I was not at all surprised by this, but what was surprising was the fact that most mothers were under the impression that their children would basically just sit silently and not interact with any other babies.  They are delighted when their babies reach out (literally) or “talk” to each other.  Most babies here don’t spend time with other babies—only adults (and plenty of them, at that), so it’s been fun to watch them become so social.

7)     I love this work far more than I could have imagined. The babies are real little individuals to me and I love their personalities and uniqueness.  Most of all, I truly love coming to class each day to be greeted by the little smiles and kicks and arm waves and squeals of delight. What fun!

I’m so lucky to have the opportunity to pursue this.

Infants in the right stage of development are absolutely enthralled during my classes.

They stare at my face (especially my mouth).

They hang on my every word.

They giggle and coo and drool and are generally very happy throughout the 30 minutes that they are sitting in front of me.

But those who are beyond the sitting-and-listening stage and on to standing/scooting/walking (I call them the “movers and shakers”) need a completely different kind of setting for language learning.

From December, I’ll be offering a new series of classes designed for the older, more active learner.  These ten-to-fourteen month olds are beyond Lucky Baby but not yet ready for Lucky One.

Lucky Little One.  Should be fun!

Okay, I already wrote a whole book about that, but at this time of year (back to school) I tend to do a lot of head shaking about the angst expressed by parents and students who still believe they have to do things the traditionally hyper-competitive way.

That’s so Old School, but I’m not going to launch into my tirade here.

Instead, I’ll share a happy email I received this week from a student who is thrilled to be on a different track.  (Psst–her parents are pretty excited, too!)  I’ve edited it and removed identifying info, even though I’m guessing Rosie would be delighted to go public.

Here’s some of what she said:

Hello Mrs. Frost,

My name is Rosie.  I am 18 years old and thanks to your book, I am a global student.

I graduated American high school in three years (it turned out that I had enough credits – was only missing one unit of PE credit) and did a Rotary Youth Exchange my senior year to XXXX, France.  There were certainly nay-sayers; most of them kids my age telling me that I would regret missing prom, football games and graduation.  But I am very lucky that both of my parents were behind me supporting me 100%.

I also want to add that by reading your book, I discovered Rotary Youth Exchange.  Thank you so much!  Since my freshman year I loved my French classes and wanted to leave and see the world as soon as possible.  However all of the going abroad programs were always too expensive for my family and although I held a few part-time jobs it would have been a long road earning the $10,000 to $12,000 .  After reading your book I immediately called my local Rotary club and started the application process.

My exchange was the best and the most difficult year of my life so far.  I never once regretted going even when I was dealing with major language problems, a new school in a new country, and a completely different culture.  During my exchange I passed the French high school diploma exam - le baccalauréat, in order to go to their university.

That’s what I’m doing this year.  I am going to my first year of college in France.  And I think that’s really cool!  My tuition for the entire year is so cheap that I paid in cash (187 euros) while my friends back home will have thousands dollars in debt at American universities.  I have to hold back my wanting to do spontaneous cartwheels whenever I talk with my friends back home – I have to keep reminding myself that it isn’t polite to gloat.

Needless to say my parents are delighted about the cost (or I should say the lack thereof) and very proud of me.

My next plans are to travel as much as possible while I’m here – little Ryanair airplanes and couchsurfing here I come.  Next year I plan to transfer to Germany to learn German for two years until I graduate.  I will finish one year in advance of my American friends, trilingual, and with very little debt compared to them.

I can not tell you how much your book has changed my perspective on what I can do in terms of my education.  Suddenly it’s my education and not an education.  You saved an extremely bored high school girl from the wheels and cogs of the College Board machine.

Thank you so much,
Rosie

After two years of getting these messages almost daily, I am still so excited to see kids like this leapfrog over their peers with tremendous enthusiasm and direction.  It doesn’t take slavish devotion to the college admissions rules to get a great education.  Those who listen to their hearts, pay attention to the options and seize their best opportunities are the ones most likely to thrive before, during and after the college years.

And the ones like Rosie who find their own path?  Their experiences and enthusiasm far outweigh the “prestige” of the hoops jumped through by their more mainstream peers.

Rosie is making her own luck–and playing by her own rules.  Cheers to Rosie and the other Bold Schoolers who are celebrating their freedom to get a great global education on their own terms and time lines.

I’m very excited about a new project I am launching this fall in Beijing!  I’ve spent months studying the latest research in infant language acquisition and have been especially intrigued by the most recent studies by Dr. Patricia Kuhl, co-director of University of Washington’s Institute for Learning and Brain Sciences and the work of Dr. Janet Werker at the University of British Columbia’s Infant Studies Centre.   Don’t miss Dr. Kuhl’s fascinating TEDX talk on the linguistic genius of babies!

It turns out that infants are geniuses at learning languages–they are born with the ability to recognize all sounds in all human languages but this ability diminishes dramatically by the first birthday.  Studies show that exposure to a second language during a key period of development (between six and ten months or so) can help infants “lock in” this natural ability, which may make it much easier for them to learn English (or any other language) as they get older.

The program I’ve developed utilizes the very same techniques used in the studies to expose infants to the sounds of English through face-to-face interaction and the liberal use of  ”motherese”–the high-pitched voice used my mothers in every culture to communicate with their babies.

Fortunately, I am quite fluent in motherese.  And I am utterly convinced that early exposure to foreign languages (thanks to the international students who lived in our home when our children were babies) is what helped my four daughters learn languages later (at 15 or so) so easily.  They still view learning languages as a fun and easy task even though they are now in their twenties and officially well beyond the “golden age” for language learning which ends at around the 7th birthday.

We Americans often marvel at how Europeans can speak so many languages, but think about this:  most of them heard other languages from birth!  This exciting new research is helping scientists and educators alike view infancy as a period of profound potential–and one that should not be squandered.

Who knew playing with babies in a second language could be so incredibly beneficial to their little brains?  Now, plenty of people know, and I’m thrilled to be given the opportunity to offer Lucky Baby English FREE to the infants in my community in Beijing.

It still thrills me to get email messages from parents and students who have read my book, The New Global Student.  I’m lucky that I get that thrill several times a week, and since it’s August and everyone is refocusing on school, I’ve been getting a lot of mail from parents lately.  Many are taking the ideas in the book and running with them, happily discovering resources that are changing the lives of their kids.

This week, I heard from a single dad whose two teenage daughters had been living with their mother for the last few years and were failing in high school despite being smart and doing well throughout their elementary and middle school years.   (This is a common refrain I hear from single parents whose kids are going through a tough transition in the family while navigating the extra work and social challenges of high school.)

Here’s an excerpt from his message to me:

I just wanted to write a brief note to say THANK YOU for your awesome book. It had such an impact that I bought 5 extra copies to lend/give to other parents and educators AND a Kindle copy for me to take when I travel.

Three months ago, it became necessary to recover custody of my two teenage daughters from my ex.  She had completely neglected them in every way…especially their education. The 16 year old had failed 9th grade twice and the 15 yr old once! They were both A students during the first 5 years that they lived with me…then struggled terribly during the last 5 years with her.

I had no idea how I was going to get them caught up, let alone motivate them to want to continue on to college. Then, in my frantic flurry of research for a “Bold School” method of educating my girls…I found your book!  It was a life saver!

Because of your book, my views on the GED (among countless other things) were re-framed and it became the best option for my daughters. They were both excited to take the test.

Your ideas caused me to continue my research on how to transition them to college and get them start started online… and at an amazing college program… Harvard University Extension School ! Yes! THE REAL HARVARD! They have an open enrollment program… skip the traditional enrollment process and the expense! Undergrad Courses only cost an average of $1000 per course. (about the same as a public university) They offer Associate and Bachelors Degree programs as well as Graduate Degree programs. Anyone can enroll…anyone.

So thanks to you, my daughters’ education and future has been snatched from the pit of failure. Not only will they finish their secondary education, but they are now registered as students and are excited about starting their first class at Harvard next month!

Deeply grateful,

R

Great, huh?  In addition to being thrilled about the Harvard online option this resourceful dad sang the praises of k12 and a great site I often recommend:  Khan Academy Find more distance learning options by cruising through guides to online schools.

Maybe you loved high school, or maybe you just managed to get through it. Either way, your son or daughter may be having a very different experience than you did, and it’s important to listen to their concerns.  The world has changed, and your job as a parent is to help your student thrive in it.

Whether your kids are struggling through the consequences of a divorce or just ready to consider a more personalized and fulfilling path through high school, I invite you to look into the many fantastic alternatives available.

You never know what a little digging might reveal–and how it could change the life of your child forever.

Psst:  You might start by checking out the inspiring student stories in my book.

It’s been a full month since we arrived in Beijing, and here we are, settled in our new apartment across the street from our new (opening in September) school and embarking on a whole new life once again.  It’s been an eye-opening experience and one that has filled me with a great deal of appreciation.

Here are a few things that have struck me so far:

1) This is the land of opportunity. What I have noticed is the willingness to accept and embrace new ideas.  I happen to work for a company that is in growth mode (like most of China) and open to suggestions, but in general, it feels like this is a place that welcomes innovation.  I had an idea for a project, and boom–marketing team is on it, and it’s scheduled to launch in October with full support from the company. There was no reluctance or endless process of evaluating the idea–instead, it was embraced with great enthusiasm and trust.  I have never been treated with more respect, listened to more intently or encouraged more wholeheartedly.

2) Things happen very quickly here. Related to number one above.  Example:   one thing that has concerned me about teaching abroad–30 years ago and more so now–is that the beloved English books we all read to our children aren’t always the best teaching tools here for preschoolers–they are too wordy for beginning language learners and many of the scenes/activities depicted are culturally irrelevant to Chinese children.  Like many teachers, I end up making up my own stories half the time because what’s written on the page just doesn’t work in that setting.  So, I spent maybe an hour researching publishing in China online, pitched a top agency (the biggest one in China) and within a couple of days, I had a meeting with an agent/rights manager here in Beijing.  At that meeting, she said she knew of an editor at a large publishing company that would be interested in my ideas, so she called her right then and she showed up in minutes.  The editor loved my ideas and asked if I could put together 12 books rather than the three I suggested, then whipped out her smartphone and showed me a site with an interactive English lesson and asked if I could provide digital content as well.  Oh, and she tossed out this December as a likely publication date.  WOW!

3) People are kind. Of course, I know that there are kind people everywhere, but I guess I was not expecting that, in a city of 22 million people, I would witness so many little random acts of kindness.  I had always known/heard that Chinese people could be a little pushy/demanding–and I am sure that is true in many cases.  But I see a lot of tenderness.  It’s a delightful surprise.

4) It’s clean and green in unexpected ways. I knew the air would be crappy (it is about half the time) but I didn’t expect the parks to be so immaculate and beautifully maintained.  The landscaping along the streets is surprisingly beautiful–and downright artistic.  It’s not just rows of the same shrubs over and over again but mixed beds of very diverse plantings for all-season interest.  Our courtyard area is especially lovely.   This pleases me to no end as I was thinking that Beijing would be a sea of gray.  Green, green, green!  (In summer, at least.)

Oh, there are a lot of things I could write about, but I’ll stop here.  New opportunities, quick momentum, kindness and greenery.  Not a bad way to start.

I haven’t dropped off the face of the earth–I’ve just been exploring it.

Tom and I left Japan in March (good timing) and spent several months traveling throughout Southeast Asia.  We are now very happy to be settling into a brand new life in Beijing, where we are working for an education company that focuses on very young learners.  We’re excited to be returning to our first love (we met as teachers in Japan in the eighties) and feel very fortunate to have an opportunity to create something really cool while living in such a fascinating country!

I haven’t been blogging here (obviously) as I’m not sure if what I’m doing now is something people want to read about. Well, that and I’m concentrating on being wherever I am rather than trying to document my experiences.  It’s just more fun to be out and about than to sit at home and type–at least, for now.

But that could change.  If you’ve been following me for a while (say, from Mexico to Argentina to Uruguay to Japan to China), you know that I embrace change!  So, we’ll see what happens.

Thanks for your interest in what I’m up to.  I’m always happy to hear from readers of my book and anyone who wants to connect!  Go ahead and send me an email at maya(at)mayafrost.com

And I was thinking that there would be a palpable sense of being down at the heels, but in Tokyo, the girls were dressed as stylishly as ever, things were super clean and bustling, the stores were busy and decorated for Christmas, and it all felt terribly prosperous. I realize this is a surface impression and that a nation’s economy can be in extremely dire straits while citizens go on about their business (hello, USA), but overall, it seemed more positive than I was envisioning it.

There have been other surprises. I knew about the politeness and efficiency, of course, but it still made me grin to have a taxi driver praise our Japanese to the high heavens and apologize for a slightly sudden stop that required him to back up a few inches so as to not enter the crosswalk area. I knew about the impeccable service, but it sill amazed me that every single store clerk, restaurant waitperson and even random uniformed workers were so immaculately attired and meticulous in everything they did, from (artfully) wrapping my paper shopping page with plastic on a rainy day to presenting my morning breakfast set (natto, raw egg, rice, nori, tea, miso shiro) with everything just so on the tray. Sure, I expected the Shinkansen to be as impressive as ever, but I couldn’t get over the beauty of the countryside as we sped along the tracks—the glorious colors of the late fall leaves, the leaning towers of bamboo, a snow-capped Mt. Fuji looming in the distance.

Granted, we’re not coming here with a fresh-from-the-States perspective. We’re coming from a year on a farm in rural Uruguay and five years in Latin America. And that’s why the culture shock really hits us.

On Thursday morning, we took a walk around our new neighborhood, a mostly residential area with modern Japanese-style homes, lovingly-tended gardens (the old ladies were out in force this morning, fussing over their flower pots despite the low temperature), narrow winding streets, and an imposing temple just around the corner. There’s a rice paddy behind the 7-11 (the store closest to us), a couple of coffee shops (old style) and a dazzling grocery store that dumbfounded us as we strolled the aisles and admired the beautiful displays of produce—and the unexpectedly low prices, as in cheaper than Uruguay (with its IVA tax) or Argentina (with its inflation).

Our first night, we took a hot Japanese-style bath, ate our sashimi, split a beer and were conked out by 9 pm. Unfortunately, we woke up at 1:30 am. It’s taking us a while to get adjusted, and despite popping vitamin C hourly, going from relative isolation in a summertime drought to 28 hours of plane travel and a cold winter drizzle is taking its toll.

We are marveling at the eye-popping availability of everything imaginable. We shake our heads and grin as we attempt to absorb the sheer vastness of the consumer choices. We did some grocery shopping at that gorgeous store (broccoli, tofu, bok choy, niida, spinach) and on Thursday morning spent two hours combing every aisle of the Kahwa, a Home Depot type of store a short distance away. At one point, I walked down a garden center aisle giggling as I eyed the dozens of sizes and types of stakes—bamboo, fake bamboo, green plastic, black plastic—in every conceivable size and shape. Back in Uruguay, there were absolutely NO stakes available to buy to stake our tomatoes—we were told that everyone (the very few who dare to grow tomatoes, anyway) uses whatever they have on hand. Tom sawed a long piece of rebar left over from the construction into several sections and used that, but several more rebar-less plants are doomed to droop. In the spring, I had to special order a tray for starting seed—at the only feed store in town—and at Kahma, there was a section with dozens of shapes and sizes of starting trays and a plethora of potting mixes and plant tags, not to mention an entire row of shears, scythes, and other high-quality and well-designed garden tools.

Granted, any Home Depot in the States—or a similar store in other countries—would have similar offerings, but because we’ve been in rural Uruguay, visiting one of these stores has made us realize how much more innovative we’ve had to become to handle even the most basic tasks. Here, it’s just so darn easy, especially if you have a car and money to spend.

In our part of Uruguay, it’s been a struggle to buy sheets, kitchen items, furniture, clothes, you name it—and so, in general, we just didn’t. And you know what? We got used to it. It seemed comfortable despite the spareness of the furnishings, the blank walls and the less-than luxurious accouterments. And of course, we saved a lot of money because there were just so few things to buy, and we got out of the habit of thinking we should solve our problems by going to the store to buy a solution. Now, that year of simplicity is beginning to look more like deprivation—and we’re trying to hang on to the joy we felt watching the sunrise and listening to the birds, the peacefulness of gazing at the rolling hills and the delight of waving at passing gauchos on horseback or the drivers of 70-year-old trucks on the road. We had so many happy times there despite our lack of access to material goods. No—we had happy times because we were so far removed from material goods and the striving that tends to go along with a consumer lifestyle.

It’s clear that being back in a consumer society (and specifically this one) means we will face an interesting challenge. I think that spending a year living so simply will help us abstain from purchasing things here, but it may take more resistance than we expect. I hope we can keep our apartment as spare as it is now, but I know how things tend to creep into a household when everything is right there, reasonably priced and tempting.

I wouldn’t say we’re giddy—we’re a little too sleep-deprived for that—but we’re definitely filled with excitement. More than that, we’re recognizing that we’re here for a reason and it’s up to us to remain open so that we can do our very best to fulfill our roles.

I hope we can give everyone even more than what they hope to receive from us. In the meantime, we’re filled with gratitude that we’ve been given this opportunity to be here.

It’s great to be back.